Hey there, friend!

We’re about to get really vulnerable, so buckle up and thank you in advance for allowing me the space for grace and honesty without judgment.

I’ve struggled with disordered thoughts around food for as long as I can remember. I was always naturally thin as a child, but a lot of my mom’s body dysmorphia seeped into my early thought patters, and man those are difficult to get rid of. I always enjoyed exercise and preferred healthy foods, so I really never even knew how much of this toxicity I had internalized until I began to struggle with infertility in my mid 20s.

It took us almost 4 years to get pregnant with our first son, and throughout that process I tried just about everything from herbs, vitamins, and acupuncture to Clomid and IUI and even fertility diets. This took me down an extremely slippery slope. I’m extremely type A, and I saw this as a problem needing to be solved. I became so strict about my fertility diet that if I didn’t have a “good” option to eat, I wouldn’t eat at all. This paired with the general stress of unexplained infertility meant that at 5’7” I weighted somewhere just under 100lbs. There were people around me that were definitely expressing their concerns, and those who were likely afraid to because I was not in the place to hear it. It was finally my acupuncturist who said something to me that really clicked. She said, “All food is fuel going to the nourishment of your body and that’s what you really need right now.” That was the moment I began my intuitive eating journey.

It wasn’t until 10 years later after the birth of my third child that I heard the actual name for this concept I had been living by called “intuitive eating” on TikTok. Intuitive eating takes the whole “eat this, not that” mentality flips all that on its head, and I just want to share a little bit of what I’ve learned over the past 10+ years of practicing intuitive eating, because there is a lot of misinformation out there about what it is and what it isn’t.

Intuitive eating is all about listening to your body. Instead of following rigid diet rules, intuitive eating encourages us to tune into our hunger and fullness signals. It’s like relearning how to trust our bodies again, which is pretty liberating. I feel like my entire 30s have been about reconnecting with my inner child and thinking about what I would tell her and what would be healthy and happy for her. If you’ve found yourself on a similar journey, this may speak to and even help to begin to heal your inner child in the same way.

The whole idea is built around a handful of mindset changes. The first one is to reject the diet mentality. It’s about saying goodbye to the guilt and shame that come with diets and welcoming a more compassionate approach. Giving ourselves the grace to be imperfect.

Honoring Your Hunger

This principle is all about feeding your body when it needs food. No more starving yourself to fit into that dress or skipping meals to save calories. It’s about eating when you’re hungry and not letting yourself get to that hangry stage (we both know how scary that can be!). No good practitioner of the intuitive eating movement will share starvation diets (photos of handfuls of almonds and a tiny square of chocolate) and extreme exercise (sweating it out 7 days a week) as a part of their routine, this is just diet culture masquerading as intuitive eating.

Making Peace With Food

This involves giving yourself unconditional permission to eat. By doing this, you reduce the power food has over you. No foods are “good” or “bad”, they’re all going to the nourishment of your body and giving you fuel to do what you need to do each day. The intention behind intuitive eating is not to lose weight, it’s to challenge disordered thinking around food.

The Satisfaction Factor

It’s about finding joy in eating again. Enjoying your meals, savoring the flavors, and really being present while you eat. It makes a huge difference in how you feel about food. When I say that the only reason I travel is for the food, I really mean it! I love trying new things and flavors which is also evident in the stories I share of what I cook over on Instagram.

Feeling Your Fullness

It’s about paying attention to your body’s signals that say, “I’ve had enough.” It’s not about being stuffed but comfortably satisfied. And, if you go overboard sometimes, it’s no big deal. You learn and move on.

Coping With Your Emotions Without Using Food

This one hits home for people who tend to eat when they’re stressed, bored, or even happy. Intuitive eating teaches us to find other ways to deal with our emotions, like talking to a friend, taking a walk, or diving into a good book.

Respecting Your Body

It’s about embracing your body for what it is and not constantly trying to change it. (I won’t lie, this one is a daily battle for me because my body dysmorphia runs deep). This is the most common misconception I see about intuitive eating, that you’ll finally get the body you’ve been trying to get with all the yo-yo dieting. Weight loss is not the goal of intuitive eating. I’ll say it again, weight loss is not the goal (and rarely the result) of intuitive eating. The goal is loving the body you already have and giving it the nourishment it needs and not feeling ashamed of it. If you’re seeing before and after body photos of someone claiming to practice intuitive eating, they’re honestly missing the point entirely and perpetuating the toxicity of diet culture and body dysmorphia.

I highly recommend doing everything in moderation. If you start out too crazy you won’t stick with it, and this is meant to be a lifelong process and shift in mindset. A great place to start for me was simple. I can have dessert because I also ate a well-balanced meal. If was craving sugar and instead of eating a little bit of ice cream and feeling guilty, eating an entire bowl of strawberries. It was speaking the mantra over everything I ate that “this is going to the nourishment of my body”.

So, there you have it – a little crash course in intuitive eating. What it is, what it isn’t, and a little about my journey with disordered thoughts around food. It’s all about being kind to ourselves and trusting our bodies. I hope this in some way helps you to give yourself more grace, because life is hard enough, we have to be able to enjoy the little things like pasta and chocolate. you know?  

For more, check out “Intuitive Eating” By Evelyn Trimbole.

So much love,
Kendra

As with any lifestyle changes, speak to your doctor to see what’s right for you. I am not a medical professional.